The Nigel is screaming and the Eaton is howling, way down in Holwell tonight. There's a Z on its stand with its tank on the shelf and the cams shining oh so bright There's spanners on the floor and feelers in the head, and a bloody useless magnet-onna-stick Oh, and down in the tunnel where the camchain is rising, I swear I saw a valve shim, stuck in a crevice, it was saying to him "God, what a dick...." Oh camshims are the only thing in this old barge that're round and flat and thin and wherever you block and whatever you wedge they're always gonna find a way in But you gotta get it out, gotta take it out now before the final valve is done so you gotta make the most of your one sump together when it's open you know you'll both be so undone He's gonna hit the Blinger with a battering ram And an angle grinder wielded right Plus a bloody big hammer, and a grab-onna-stick and a little fibre optic light It's never gonna roll till he delves into that hole And pulls the little fucker out If he hits the starter now, there'll be a bloody big "Ka-pow!" And he'll never have to worry, no he'll never have to worry, About the tappets being five thou over-tight.... Like a shim outa Hell it'll be gone when the morning comes When the engine turns over That shim out of Hell will be gone, gone, gone Like a shim outa Hell it'll be gone when the morning comes When the stripdown's done And the shim's fished out And the crankshaft shining through And like a shimmer before the camchain tunnel I'll come shimming on back to you And he knows that he's blinged if it never gets out And maybe he's blinged if it do But with any other heap he'd have let it fall apart And now he'd prob'ly be reaching for glue If he gotta be blinged you know he wanna be blinged Searching for the shim he knew If he gotta be blinged you know he wanna be blinged Gotta be blinged you know heanna be blinged If he gotta be blinged you know he wanna be blinged Searching for the shim Searching for the shim Searching for the shim Searching for the shim he knew It was a hot summer night and the crank was turning There was a engine oil all over your hand When you lifted off the cam you saw the sprocket turning Then the bastard shim was Falling through your trembling hands You were squinting your eyes with your maglite shining It would turn the engine's contents to paste It was lying all hidden in the crankcase lining By the light of the torch You know there's not another moment Not another moment Not another moment to waste The engine's so heavy that your knees grow weak It weighs in at three hundred pound' You're straining your back but no matter what you do You just can't seem to get it off the ground And then you dropped the shim right into your sump Oh it must have been while you were making tea You dropped the shim right into your sump And you swear it's true You were gonna get someone to do it. And then you dropped the shim right into your sump Oh it must have been while you were making tea You dropped the shim right into your sump And you swear it's true You were gonna get someone to do it. Now your body is shaking like a cat on a hotplate And you guess that you're beginning to fizz Oooh, you're finally alone and you can do what you want to The night is young And you still don't know where Still don't know where Still don't know where it is.
