Bargain mad wifes

I really am at my wits end. Wife bought a bathroom suite because it was
half price, thus saving me several hundred pounds on a bathroom suite I
didn't need or want. She had the delivery chaps put it in the garage.
This was a few months ago (1). I stated quite flatly that I was Not
going to fit it as I have no knowledge or inclination to fit it, and
anyway I like the one we have. I did casually enquire how much it would
cost to get a man in and was quite frankly stunned; to the degree of
thinking of retraining for a career change. My normal inertia soon took
hold though.
She now tells me that a particularly wealthy friend of mine, who's wife
insists on a kitchen change every year has kindly donated his old
kitchen to us (without either his or my knowledge of the fact). His wife
has ordered her men to deliver the kitchen to my garage. Now it may be a
particularly large garage, for a one car garage (2), but it will now
take on the aspect of a branch of Ikea (shudder). I have no intention of
remodeling the kitchen either. It works quite happily the way it is. MDF
doors swing just as well as solid Oak ones, and MDF tops are just as
clean as solid granite ones.
Storage space is now critical in the garage.
If any one has a Lazyboy chair and a telly going, I may just plunb up
the garage and live out there.
There is no longer any room for cars, but the Kawa "just" fits.


(1) about 36 months ago, the bathroom currenty fitted is apparenty
coming back in fashion.

(2) Fits a Volvo 740 and a Kawa 305 side by side with room to open doors
fully, and work on bikes etc. One door on driveway side, but extends
sideways into back garden a bit. One a a half garage?

 

She seems like quite a rational woman to me.

 

A 305? Are you mad?

 

How can you say that of a woman who screams so loud you can't hear the
engine on a 305 whilst trying to go round a roundabout, and destroys your
kidneys with her grip, and forces you to bail out of a 270 turn by throwing
her body the wrong way so forcibly to prevent the bike fron leaning?

 

You beat me to it...

Sell the unwanted kitchen and bathroom stuff and get a new bike. I had a 305
as a loaner once, fucking horrible piece of shit it was. And it was
new(ish) and properly maintained...

At least get a CB500 instead.....

Dave

 

It was all I was allowed, something to do with not being killed and
costing a lot less. It blew up in less than the year I prophesied it
would. I'm still saving for a bigger one, but I've still got a garage
full of shite.
To think I sold five Brit bikes to marry this woman. What was I
thinking.
Well, I just got thinking again. I'm going to sneak upstairs with the
babyoil now. See you chaps later.>>>>

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Tunku belched forth and ejected the following:

You're having a laugh, right?

 

If I texted you on Wednesday night, I apologise.

I was ver' drunk, and on a train.

--
Dan L (Oldbloke)

My bike 1996 Kawasaki ZR1100 Zephyr
Space in shed where NSR125 used to be
Spare Bike 1990 Suzuki TS50X (Patio Ornament)
BOTAFOT #140 (KotL 2005/6), X-FOT#000, DIAABTCOD #26, BOMB#18 (slow), OMF#11

 

I hope you have a makeup mirror fitted to the back of your helmet?

 

I bet she never came home with a wheel-less wheelbarrow, though,
"because it was a bargain".

 

Ferfuxxake, there's only one correct answer to "it's me or the bike",
no matter how good the BJs are - "honey, let me hold the door open for
you then".

Sell the shite and put it in the bike fund.

I think it may have been a different part of your anatomy that was
doing the thinking.

Come to think of it, it *still* seems to be doing the thinking...

 

I bet she never came home with a wheel-less wheelbarrow, though,
"because it was a bargain".[/QUOTE]


I told my mum I'd buy her a nice easy to use printer dock thingy for
her Kodak camera for her birthday so she could print out her pics.

We turned up on her birthday with the printer and I proceeded to set
it up for her. She nipped out of the room and came back with this bag
saying

"I got some printer cartridges for it, they were 2 for 1 in
Sainsburys".

"But you didn't know what printer I was getting you?"

"No, but they were 2 for 1"

"Aye, but they aren't for this printer"

"Oh, I'll take them back then .... pity though, they were 2 for 1."

 

Ah yes, the joy of replacing a wooden kitchen with a minced-wood kitchen


If only I'd have known about this a while back. I could have learned how
not to do it on yours so that mine went more smoothly.

 

Nice little bike if properly looked after. The reason so many failed was
because they were thrashed mercilessly and the oil wasn't changed frequently
enough, resulting in top end failure. If properly maintained they were no
worse than most other bikes for reliability. A belt drive (low maintenance
and quiet) small bike that was capable of sub-15sec standing 1/4 mile, over
100mph yet would easily do over 65mpg. Ideal commuter or winter hack.

 

So, did he succeed or did the wife wake up and stop him?

 

I don't really want to know.

 

And there are a few blokes who have "family meetings" where the wife and
kids decide if hubby/daddy [1] should or shouldn't [2] get a bike.

[1] Usually members of the IAM
[2] Usually the latter


--
Beav

VN 750
Zed 1000
OMF# 19

 

TMack wrote

Mine was thrashed mercilessly in and out of London in all weathers for a
couple of years and was sweet as a nut when I sold it. Black it was,
wiv red bits.

Although I did change the oil twice as often as recommended, mostly.

Lovely little bikes they was, didn't quite wheelie off the throttle in
first which made for easy enthusiastic commuting. I didn't know they
could be made to do 65mpg though. Impressed.

 

1) Remove it all from garage.

2) Douse liberally in petrol.

You can probably work out what 3) is...

November 5th is coming up soon. You could always take great pleasure in
hacking the kitchen units to bits and chucking them on the local
scrote-erected fire in your nearest park.

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Dan L belched forth and ejected the following:

No need.

You always sound like that ;o)