Chavelfish

Found in another place, this is what it makes of the first two
paragraphs of the "to be or not to be" by Billy Shakespeare.

Unfortunately the formatting will be shit but I doubt a chav would know
what a paragraf or punkchewashoon is anyway:

To be..u no..or not 2 be: dat iz de kwesshun: Wheva tiz nobla n da mnd 2
suffer de slngz and arrowz of outrageouz 4choon, Or 2 tayk armz agenst a
sea ov troubles, And by opposng end vem? 2 die: 2 sleep; No more; n by a
fukin sleep 2 say wi end de heart-ache n de vousand natural shox dat
flesh iz heir 2 ...fuk...tiz a consummashun Devoutly 2 be wishd...To
die...fuk...to sleep; To sleep: perchance 2 dream: ay...fuk...derez de
rub; 4 n dat sleep ov dead wat dreamz may cum When wi hav shuffled off
viz mortal coil, Must giv uz pause: verez de masiv respek dat maykz
calamity ov so lon life; 4 wo wud bear da whipz and scornz of time, de
oppressorz wrong...lyk...de proud manz contumely, de pangz of fukin
despyzd love..hehe..de lawz delay...lyk...

http://lewis.x3fusion.com/cgi/chavelfish/

 

reminds me of Iain M Bank's Feersum Enjun.

 

I'm a chav translates to:

Im a chav...

Interesting. At least they admit it in plain english.

 

I assume you refer to Hamlet's soliloquy in Hamlet, Act 3, Scene 1 ?

http://www-tech.mit.edu/Shakespeare/hamlet/hamlet.3.1.html

<snip chavish text>

--
Steve Parry
K100RS SE & F650
and a 520i SE Touring for comfort


(not forgetting the SK90PY)

http://www.gwynfryn.co.uk

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Steve Parry amazed us all with this pearl of
wisdom:

That's the one mate.

I remember having to learn that bastard thing but in the end I ducked
out of that and ended up slaughtering the King in "Murder in the
Cathedral"[1], I was one of the knights.

[1] Didn't require me to remember lines and the tutor said I looked like
enjoyed slitting throats.

 

Found on a printout in the pub:

http://www.boreme.com/boreme/funny-2005/chavopoly-big.htm

Chavopoly - a game for the whole extended family.

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Pip amazed us all with this pearl of wisdom:

I'm guilty of at least some of those )