Chimay buggered. Bugger!

My beloved boss has just told me we're organising another conference
this year.

Snag One - it's in Beijing. I really, really don't want to go there
again.

Snag Two - it knocks out my Chimay weekend. ****-a-doodle-doo.

Pinning my hopes on getting the new job now.

 

One of the EKS at work said to me the other day, "If you don't take your
head out from under their boot, they'll keep stamping on it."

 

Good advise.

 

What was wrong with it? All expenses paid? I'll go for you if you like.

 

Could you consume that much claret to keep up the deception ?

P.

 

There are numerous flaws in the potential plan but I am sure with a
dodgy wig and some glasses I could make a go of it.

 

Beijing is a shit-hole. It's nasty, smelly, appallingly polluted, and
there is **** all to see or do apart from the Great Wall and the
Forbidden City because Mao destroyed most of the old town, and the bits
that were left are being knocked down now to make room for the
Olympics.

The only good thing is the grub.

Covering a conference is a bastard job. You spend all your time, dawn
till duck, closeted in a plastic hotel listening to speeches and
presentations, and then you have to rush back to your room and write it
all up before zapping it to the paper. You have no time for enjoyment
or sightseeing, not that there's much to see (check above).

Couple that with a long-haul flight there and a ditto back, and
compress the whole thing into five days including travelling, and it's
just not nice.

<Thinks>

I might send one of the juniors.

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique,
TOG@toil.?.murray.invalid typed

Is that wiv spring onion and pancakes?

--
Wicked Uncle Nigel - There are few things in life more sinister than a
public toilet with the lid closed.

WS* GHPOTHUF#24 APOSTLE#14 DLC#1 COFF#20 BOTAFOT#150 HYPO#0(KoTL) IbW#41
SBS#39 OMF#6 Enfield 500 Curry House Racer "The Basmati Rice Burner",
Honda GL1000K2 (On its hols) Kawasaki ZN1300 Voyager "Oh, Oh, It's so big"
Suzuki TS250 "The Africa Single" Yamaha GTS1000

 

I see a story unfolding...

 

Don't have the drunken pigeon though.

 

They do some very nice claret in Beijing.

 

He's gone a bit quackers, if you ask me.

 

Wait till he sees the bill

 

'Hog emerged from their own little world to say

Go a bit ruddy, I expect.

 

TOG@toil, ,

A sound plan. They'll jump at it.

 

Didn't you like the women as well?

 

Oh, yeah, forgot about them.

Still, with the benefit of greater experience, they're not as good as
yanks and lebanese.

 

A 100 million bottles?

 

^^^^^^ I obviously didn't partake of a big enough sample as I was
somewhat underwhelmed but anyway.

 

Lebanese women, I can understand. Mediterranean women are, on the
whole, gorgeous.

Yank women? You must be mad...