Dear Claire

I've been given a couple of dozen home-made sausages and a bottle of
Birch sap wine by a large man who breeds pigs.

I've no problem with the bangers, but I'm a little pissed, and am
thinking of actually drinking said wine.

Is this wise? Does anyone have experience of the joys of Birch sap?

 

It won't be worse than any other home made wine. The sap is just another
source of sugar and wikipedia says the inner bark is edible. As well as
sugar it contains butulin which is anti HIV, anti-cance, anti-malarial and
anti-inflammmatory. So, it might just stop you having a hangover.

IME, pig farmers never make anything with a low ABV[1] so the alcohol has
probably killed any cross contamination from the pig shit.

[1] cider & elder wine at least.

 

Very interesting and encouraging, right up to this bit;

I've just poured a glass, and you are indeed correct about the alcohol
content. My main concern is the furniture I'm going to hit on my journey
to the floor. Nothing could survive inside the bottle.

 

don't worry, the furniture won't feel a thing

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique, wessie

WC, is that you?

 

I thought he was channelling Eric Morecambe.

 

Tch!

 

Too late, but yes. Best drank chilled IME. Actually, best not drank at
all really- a bit too sweet.

 

Excellent after dinner "aperitif" (sp)

Sweet, almost sickly, thoroughly enjoyable. Especially if over 15%

 

wrote;

It turned out to be one of the nicest (and strongest) home made wines
I've ever had. Not too sweet, subtle flavour, interesting after-tastes.
Reminded me of the original quinine taste of proper tonic water.
I am going to try and extract the production method (and more bottles)
from the wife of said pig farmer.

As a bonus, I am apparently unharmed by the experience, and may have
done my Prostate some good.

 

According to Spike Milligna, "aperitif" is French for a set of dentures.
...and a "specimen" is an Italian astronaut.

--
Ivan Reid, School of Engineering & Design, _____________ CMS Collaboration,
Brunel University. Ivan.Reid@[brunel.ac.uk|cern.ch] Room 40-1-B12, CERN
GSX600F, RG250WD "You Porsche. Me pass!" DoD #484 JKLO#003, 005
WP7# 3000 LC Unit #2368 (tinlc) UKMC#00009 BOTAFOT#16 UKRMMA#7 (Hon)
KotPT -- "for stupidity above and beyond the call of duty".