font: washing

okay, so i had the bike serviced yesterday and while the engineer was very
pleased with its general grunting, he complained at some length about how
utterly filthy it is.

generally to clean the bike i would just use wd40 and some hard wiping on
all the visible dirty bits. this is time consuming and a pita given that
i'm commuting, since it will be dirty again in a couple of days, and i can't
be bothered to do this more than once every couple of months. but i'm
more concerned at the minute with all the bits i can't easily get to with
a rag, since these parts won't have been cleaned for at least 7 years.

the engineer said to spray shiteloads of some kind of degreasant all over
everything, until the grime starts sliding off by itself in a gooey slime,
and then jetwashing.

problem with this approach: i haven't got a jetwash and don't know where
one is that i could use, and even if i did i know that there are some parts
of the bike that you mustn't point the jet at, but don't know exactly which
bits these are.

so, perhaps the font can offer some useful advice, ridicule, or perhaps
even an offer to do it for me for a reasonable sum of money.

 

Hah. My friendly local mechanic is quite happy for my bike to be dirty,
because it shows that I use it properly, not just sit and polish it then
take it out on the three sunny weekends that constitute summer.

Many petrol stations have them. Or you could buy yourself a cheap one,
next time Aldi or Lidl have them on offer.

Generally, anything that should be greasy (wheel bearings, chain), or
could be damaged by the jet (radiator fins), or you don't really want to
get that wet (electrics).

Get a man in: there's a guy in London that does bike valets, I'm sure
someone will provide his details shortly...

 

bwahahahaha, you should have seen the state of the HD mechanics who
changed the rear tyres on the bikes in California, they had no overalls,
no gloves, nowt

And they never complained, when I (sort of) appologised, he said
"No Problem, nice to see a bike being used"

Got some stuff from Wal Mart, called "Holy Cow!"
Spray on, rinse off, no jet wash needed.
Pity there is no sign of it in the UK.... nor my XJR :-(

Don't jet wash.

 

If you do want to use a jetwash buy a cheap one - they don't have much
power. I paid £30 for one that does my motorbike and my cycles. I avoid
pointing it close to bits like bearings and electrics. I generally use a
slightly widened jet and hold the nozzle a few inches from the bike as I
wash off the Mucoff that I use first. I then get closer to really dirty bits
on wheels, forks or any other bits that can take a good hosing.

John

 

It is your bike and you can have it as dirty or as clean as you like and
not to some arbitrary standard set by some fucking spanner monkey who
probably can't even spell detergent. Tell him to **** off.

 

Traffic Film Remover is good for getting general road shite off. With a
pressure washer or a bit of brushing it'll shift dirt that's been there for
several months. OTOH if the **** was working on a car, all the bits a
mechanic goes near would be covered in a lovely layer of shite.

 

If I want to shift serious amounts of manky oily crud[1] I employ a spray
can of carb cleaner. It's amazingly effective.

[1]such as you might find inside the chain guard or caked around the front
sprocket

 

You see, washing a bike is like making love to a beautiful woman ...

 

No it's not. It's like taking a shower of your own. It's mine and I can
wash it as fast as I like.

 

And I was thinking of:

"Oh well, it won't show up in the auction photographs."

 

<whistles> At least I can count links.