Merci monsieur TOG

<slaps hand to forehead>

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique, Paul Corfield

*Snort*

 

Ace scribbled:

I didn't say that. "help them to figure out when I'll be on holiday
next".

I know, but it doesn't hurt to do something trivial that'll prevent it
does it?

 

Wicked Uncle Nigel scribbled:

Too right.

I might get baked potato warriors following them too.

 

Out of interest, which of the following 'trivial' security measures do
you take when away from home:

Auto-switching lights on timers,
Asking a neighbour to come in and out occasionally,
Ensuring you never leave your recycling bins out if you're not home
that evening?

And AAMOI the only time I was ever burgled in MK was when we were both
at home, in bed.

--
_______
..'_/_|_\_'. Ace (b.rogers at ifrance.com)
\`\ | /`/
`\\ | //' BOTAFOT#3, SbS#2, UKRMMA#13, DFV#8, SKA#2, IBB#10
`\|/`
`

 

Ace scribbled:

Ross does if he's here. If he's away I'll tell the neighbours I'm away
and to keep an eye out.

The green wheely bin lives round back. The blue bottle box lives beside
the front door.

Or do you mean if I've put them out for collection, coming home just to
put them away? In which case I'd wait to put them out until next week.

First christmas in MK, house was empty, neighbours told I was away,
light timers in downstairs and upstairs (to make it look like I had
moved upstairs and then gone to sleep), and supposedly good area (hah).

They just ripped back kitchen window open, turned on all lights, and
left the house like that for the rest of the week, all lights on. None
of the neighbours took a blind bit of notice.

And as I come from "Its grim oop North" where we never needed/had
insurance, I never had any so it cost me lots.

 

Christ. When we were burgled, while away skiing, neighbour was feeding
cats. She came in, saw back French windows forced, ran back next door,
grabbed her hubby, who came round with FOAD baseball bat.

The buggers had gone, of course.

Her husband made the rear doors secure and called Plod. Superb. Good
neighbours are pure gold.

He grinned afterwards and submitted a bill of proper notepaper for
securing the place, as he's a builder/chippy and does this for a living.
Said he knew inscos coughed up instantly for this sort of thing and he'd
pitched his price at two-thirds the going rate.

They sent me a cheque virtually by return, and I handed over a large wad
of cash, so everyone was happy.

 

Sort of. We tell the nosey old dear next door we'll be away. Given
she keeps an eye on everything in the street she's most likely to
notice something odd.

Nope.

 

My neighbour's house caught fire like that. A friend came in to pick-up
the post and moved the lamp that was on the kitchen work surface. Later
that evening the lamp came on but was now pointing directly at the wall
socket which melt. It had caught fire sufficiently that when the fuse
popped the fire continued.

See above.

 

When stupid cunts collide.
--
Dave
GS850x2 XS650 SE6a

"It's a moron working with power tools.
How much more suspenseful can you get?"
- House

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique,

Genius!

I vote for VAM as Home Secretary.

 

Its a good idea though; it could catch on.
Perhaps an accomplice could check for groups of motorcycles travelling
together on the outgoing ferries, this would ensure they were actually
away at that time.
or do I mean

 

IIRC, most burglaries are opportunistic.

 

It's also worth noting that most of us aren't leaving our houses full of
gold bullion and non-traceable government bonds and the the secret recipe
for fuel made from water.

It's a lot of hassle to go to for a second-hand VCR and a few tins of
beans.

 

We don't?

<Phones bank to check on secret vault>

Phil.

 

<listens in using tracer based on numberplate recognition>

 

Simes scribbled:

LOL, you're all cunts! **** off and let me get on with inventing tin
foil paint.

 

Just Friday night ?

P.

 

I can sell you some special glasses that stop people reading your
numberplate on the web. Obviously, it's up to you to get all the web-
enabled crims to wear them, but surely it's not an insurmountable problem.

As Champ points out, they're lazy, so once you've put the specs on them,
they wont bother to take them off.

 

Maybe not then!