Paging Phil Launchbury

Phil,
If God doesn't want people to vote, why is it that the cardinals of the
catholic church vote for a new pope?

 

Hang on, we didn't finish the other thread

 

Roman Catholic != Christians. Apparently.
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"My God is better than yours..."

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique, Ginge

Phil, let's save another huge thread. Call down a smite upon Ginge, yea
unto the fourth generation.

Then we'll all believe, and you can get some kip.

Can't say fairer than that, can I?

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and Ducati Race Engineer.

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Or, if you're on their side ... Roman Catholic==Christian, any other
denomination of people believing in Christ, or not believing in him for that
matter=Burn in hell for all eternity.

So, what shall I put you down as, sir?

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AndrewR, D.Bot (Celeritas)
Kawasaki ZX-6R J1, Fiat Coupe 20v Turbo
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The speccy Geordie twat.

 

He's already ginger. Hasn't he suffered enough?

But apparently you can type it...

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique, Dan White

Well, I was hoping for something in "lightning", possibly "turn to
stone". Maybe the good old "pillar of salt"?.

The "smite with a Seat" was interesting, but ultimately ineffective. I
reckon 40,000 amps up him should do the trick. Preferably out of a blue
sky (just for avoidance of doubt).

--
Wicked Uncle Nigel - Manufacturer of the "Champion-105" range of rearsets
and Ducati Race Engineer.

WS* GHPOTHUF#24 APOSTLE#14 DLC#1 COFF#20 BOTAFOT#150 HYPO#0(KoTL) IbW#41
ZZR1100, Enfield 500 Curry House Racer "The Basmati Rice Burner",
Honda GL1000K2 (On its hols) Kawasaki ZN1300 Voyager "Oh, Oh, It's so big"

 

I think the big dude's been trying, I've spent the last 4 days dealing
with fever, shit, and almost paralysing stomach cramps in equal
measures.. The fever has subsided, and right now the cramps seem to have
stopped but that's probably down to the fact I've only been drinking
water. I've a nagging feeling that this might actually be something
proper nasty.

So............ If it's still as bad tomorrow I'm going to say sorry to
God, and get myself down A&E for a proper once over. In the mean time
I'm chancing my fucking arm, I hate this "don't feel bad enough to go,
don't feel good enough to ignore it feeling", if God exists he can sort
it out...

 

#My Jesus brings all the boys to the yard

 

You will need.

1. A small bird.
2. A ball of steel as large as the sun.
3. Plenty of free time.

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AndrewR, D.Bot (Celeritas)
Kawasaki ZX-6R J1, Fiat Coupe 20v Turbo
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BotToS#5,SBS#25,IbW#34, DS#5, COSOC# Suspended, KotTFSTR#
The speccy Geordie twat.

 

<looks above head>

What was that? I'm sure I heard something.

 

It's a variation on one of the classic ways of explaining eternity.
Specifically it's the one used by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett in "Good
Omen".

The general explaination goes like this ... "Imagine a [something very, very
large - a Sun or a mountain are the norms] made of [something very hard,
although for a mountain rock is perfectly acceptable]. Once every [100 / 1,000
/ 1,000,000] years a tiny [bird or butterfly] visits the [big thing] and
[brushes it with its wing / takes away a pebble / does something to make the
big thing fractionally smaller]. In the time it takes the [little thing] to
wear away the [big thing] to nothing at all eternity will only just have
begun".

All of the above can be roughly paraphrased as "Eternity is a _fucking_ long
time!".

Coming next: Where is that pesky god and how many sets of footprints are there
anyway?

 

Ginge wrote:

[dodgy guts]

nah - "kill or cure".

Six pints of Guinness and a King Prawn Phal.

Sorted.

 

wrote:

Sounds lovely, but...

<the rest of the reply below for those that are up to toilet related
posts>













































....not until I've seen solids at least once this week.

 

That's what the Guinness is for, isn't it?

 

You were pretty ill while you were there though, IIRC. So it's not an
incubation period but a recurrence. Think stuff like malaria.

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*ding*

And hey, a boiled-egg bahji wouldn't hurt on that score either.