Paging: TOG

No, you just keep them up to date with the news and the family and all
that.

 

Yep. We never kept bees, but we always had the tradition of going to the end
of the garden and telling them of anything important. Wonder what it dates
back to....

Ali

 

Well, you can tell them that mad Uncle Shaun is still banned by C4.

 

Will do ;-)

 

Um, isn't that talking to yourself?

Allegedly, they get used to the sound of your voice. Bees are very
sensitive to air vibrations, currents, etc. And once they get used to
you, they're relaxed when they hear you nearby, instead of being on
guard.

I talk to them because it's the only was I can have a captive audience
in my household. I'm taking them through the history of Honda CB500T
twins at the moment.

I think they're hibernating, actually. Or feigning sleep.

 

Probably. Which undoubtredly reinforces my reputation.

That makes huge sense. Intelligent little beasts.

You want to watch that, you know, they may decide to emigrate.

Ali

 

RSPCB, shirley?

I'll get me old gardening coat. (Beats hasty retreat to the potting shed.)

Ali

 

Mad Aunt Mary, who wandered round the garden talking to the plants. The
bee story was made up to cover for the old girl's meanderings,
especially when she was found knickerless in the vicarage front lawn in
the dead of night.

 

The Older Gentleman says...

When my son was a toddler I'd send him to sleep by telling him Alec
Issigonis' life history. We never got as far as designing the Morris
Minor before Dan was away with the fairies.

 

<looks frantically around for smart arse riposte>

<fails miserably to think of one>

Er, I thought bees were important enough to warrant their own RSPC? Nah.
That didn't work, did it.

Ali

 

We apparently get a regular visitation of 'bumble bees' in the loft
here at the chateau.
Not honey bees though. They arrive in mid to late June and buzz about a
lot for about three weeks. Surprisingly noisy according to my mate who
was here for a week during the height of their activity. Just stay for
a while and move on apparently. Once he identrified where they were
getting in and out and we had sussed out they were not bartard wasps he
left them to it, but apparently had to move in to the other bedroom to
get away from the noise.

 

Bumble Beez live in very small colonies - a few dozen, at most a few
hundred bees, whereas Hunny Beez live in colonies of up to 50,000.

Yes, leave them to it. Bumble Beez are cool, and I have neve rheard of
anyone who's been stung by one.

 

Tell him the history of the RD400... He'll go off quicker... ;-)

 

Owen says...

He's 13, he has other things on his mind nowadays.

 

Ah, RD50s.

 

The Older Gentleman says...

Jessica Simpson and Eva Longoria actually, oh, and his girlfriend.

 

Look on the bright side: it would have fixed your arthritis.

Ali

 

His girlfriend?? ****, at age 13 I was still thinking Airfix 1/72 scale
Spitfires.

<Ponders>

Still am, actually.

 

The Older Gentleman says...

At 13 I'd already been going out with my daughter's mum for 2 years. I
thought Dan was a bit slow on the uptake really.

 

Simon Gates wrote

Only two days on a liquid diet?

Kin lightweight.