rant: feet on seats

it's the same sort of oxymoron as "military intelligence".

 

Not really. UK Public transport may be crap, but it is still, however
you look at it, transport for the public.
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I think Sir needs to revise what 'oxymoron' means ...

D.

 

Agreed. I can't see how the words public and transport are
contradictory. Tautology is closer, in so far as I think that darsy was
implying that what other form of transport is there in the context being
discussed?

Having said that, his analogy with referring to supermarkets as 'public
shopping' is an interesting one. "Private shop" summons completely
different connotations.


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+-------------------------------------------------------------+
| Pete Fisher at Home: |
| Voxan Roadster Gilera Nordwest Yamaha WR250Z |
| Gilera GFR * 2 Moto Morini 2C/375 |
+-------------------------------------------------------------+

 

Whilst darsy's a bit of an arrogant, often pretentious ****, he's a bit
too clued up to mistakenly call 'public transport' an 'oxymoron' based on
the rationale above. I can only assume, therefore, that he was being
ironic, and that we've been collectively *whooshed*.

D.

 

Sucking his keyboard for inspiration, darsy typed:

i.e. not a real one, like "pretty ugly", "smart casual" or "civil war",
which are only *apparently* paradoxical or self-contradictory. My favourite
is on a coffee machine at work - "free vend".

Real oxymorons are genuine contradictions: "and faith unfaithful kept him
falsely true", or "no light; but rather darkness visible".

 

Arbeit macht frei.....

 

That's all of them innit?

 

I'm waiting for an upsurge in thefts of blue passes, now.

 

Und kleine Wichser lachen macht.

D.

 

Our local Safeway, before it became a Morrisons, tried to penalise me
like that. I got home, grabbed the Doctor's Micra, and nipped out to
buy some beer. On exit, they said I'd been there over two hours and
had to pay a surcharge. I gawped, and said I'd been there 30 minutes,
if that.

They said they'd recorded the car being there earlier, so I said that
perhaps my wife had been there before I got home, but I had only
popped in and out and they hadn't recorded the details right. And then
fucked off.

Local McDonalds used to employ one of these highwayman outfits to
monitor their car park. Aforesaid highwaymen waited until punters came
out of the place, and nipped over the road to get a video from
Blockbuster (right opposite) and then clamped them. McD, of course,
said it was nothing to do with them. There was such a stink in the
local paper that they canned the scheme.

 

"Boltcutter user, meet criminal damage charge and welcome to our
accompanying DNA test."

 

Would be my solution too. A horrible cheap nasty padlock, as well. I
mean, how can they prove theirs was a whizzo FOAD one if it isn't
there?

 

Sucking his keyboard for inspiration, Lucifer typed:

 

There is a fourth way...

buy 4 clamps on ebay, clamp yourself first

They can't clamp you without first unclamping your car. If that's not
criminal damage, they can't complain about you unclamping yourself
again later. If it is criminal damage to unclamp someone elses clamp,
they can't unclamp you without opening a large can of worms.

bonus: They think they already clamped you, so ignore the car.

bonus 2: You probably get an insurance discount, as vehicle theft just
became less likely.

I still have some Lebanese numberplates somewhere, which would
facilitate tracing the vehicles owner, should I stick them on Ebay?

On second thoughts, I'm not sure I want the bomb squad to clamp my
car...

Johannes

 

TOG@toil,,

Friend of mine got in trouble for grafiting that over the door to the
staff room at the school he went to...

Johannes

 

oh, FFS, for all of you (except dog, who seemed to get it), and it's
not complicated, FFS:

"public transport" is not now, and has not been for a long time, a
"public" service i.e. one run by the government for the benefit of the
"public" - it's fucking "private", not "public".

 

Does this mean it is like schools then and that only rich people and
Labour MP's can use it?

 

Well yes, but by that interpretation some elements of "public transport"
never were. Hackney carriages for example.

--

+-------------------------------------------------------------+
| Pete Fisher at Home: |
| Voxan Roadster Gilera Nordwest Yamaha WR250Z |
| Gilera GFR * 2 Moto Morini 2C/375 |
+-------------------------------------------------------------+