Spagthorpe Clumber Spaniel blueprints scanned

As you may remember, I bought a Spagthorpe Clumber Spaniel bike that was
sitting in a barn for $150 2 Septembers ago. Unfortunately, soon
afterwards, the bike went out of control due to the diesel engine
ingesting its own lube oil supply and revving up to 15,000 rpm. The
electrodynamic brakes with mechanical backup simply weren't strong enough
to stop the bike.

Fast forward to this year. Apparently, the old guy who sold me the bike
passed away recently, and his estranged daughter found my name and address
in his records as the buyer of the bike. After work today, I found a
teary-eyed women sitting on my front doorstep with a yellowed sheet of
grid paper. Anyway, she had also found an old development blueprint of
the Clumber stashed under her late father's mattress. Since I never
managed to take any pics of the Clumber - I crashed it into a swamp soon
after I bought it - I decided post a scan of the blueprint for your
enjoyment:

http://www.sccs.swarthmore.edu/users/01/aszafran/SClumber.jpg

BTW- I think the old guy from whom I bought the bike may actually have
been Chaim Pishtah, the reclusive former chief engineer of Spagthorpe.
The guy's name was Chris Piston if I recall correctly, and he spoke with a
thick Eastern European accent. I'm thinking that Chaim Pishtah actually
faked his death in the chain lubing accident of 1970 to escape being
killed by some ex-Nazis that held a grudge due to his contribution to the
British war effort. Chris Piston was a poor Americanization of a fine
name. Kind of surprising that his daughter is only 30 or so
(or maybe she's older, but she doesn't look it).

Anyway, more later - I have a date for tonight...

-Andrew Szafran

 

Sorry, a correction. He was actually being hunted by SMERSH for designing
the Clumber Spaniel with the hot engine directly under the rider's 'nads
and contributing to the impotence of the Soviet male. (An unauthorized
version of the Clumber Spaniel was manufactured by the Dnepr factory for a
while until the engine heat problem was noticed and the chief engineer of
the factory was executed for conspiracy against the Soviet state.
Unfortunately, the Clumber Spaniel prototype that the Soviets stole and
chose to copy was missing its underseat asbestos shielding and Stalin
ordered the chief engineer of the Dnepr factory to copy the bike
*exactly*.)

Cheers,
Andrew

 

You might want to pass this on to http://dieselbikes.com as well.

 

What a crock of shite..

J.