SQUIRRELS (long)

I spent an eventful weekend as a virtual prisoner at the Royal Masonic
School for girls in Rickmansworth when I was 18. How the **** I managed
to ride my RD400 home is anyone's guess, cos I hadn't slept and was
sexually abused by two very fit 6th formers for over 48 hours.


--
Lozzo
Versys 650 Tourer
Fireblade 929 (For sale)
CBR600F-W trackbike
SR250 SpazzTrakka,
SR250 wivva topbox
TS250C
RD400F, somewhere
I see a bright new future, where chickens can cross the road with no
fear of having their motives questioned

 

Hmmm

I know someone who is the right age to have been there at the time

 

Your daughter?

--
Lozzo
Versys 650 Tourer
Fireblade 929 (For sale)
CBR600F-W trackbike
SR250 SpazzTrakka,
SR250 wivva topbox
TS250C
RD400F, somewhere
I see a bright new future, where chickens can cross the road with no
fear of having their motives questioned

 

You must be joking - I have been very careful that through life my seed
has fallen on barren ground, so to speak

She's a doctor's wife in Knighton

 

im a happily married man , besides going home every weekend with empty bollocks may
have been a tad suspicous to her indoors , her mother was already laying the poison
down about my activities whilst away from home

 

These crap on the wall, but eat mosquitos. A good deal methinks.

View from my bedroom window this morning:

http://paulcarmichael.org/gecko.JPG

 

They let you use the net in prison?
What sort of place is that - wire mesh, and bars on the windows. To stop
you throwing pasties out the windows?

Alan.

 

All houses in this part of the world have "rejas" (bars) on the outside
of the windows.

All houses in this part of the world have "malla" (mesh) on the inside of
the windows.

The former to keep out the "chorizos" (scrotes) and the latter the
mosquitos.

 

We had one do the same thing at the bodyshop. The fucker got under the roof
tiles and into the office and brew room (Actually on top of the office). It
too. was a hard nosed little **** and defied all calls to "move no", so I
lobbed thinners soaked rags at it, but didn't have the nerve to lob a match
too as we need the bodyshop to earn, so a plan was hatched to stop the twat
getting back in after it left to gather provisions.

This entailed a can of expandy foam and the hole the tree rat used to gain
access to the building. The fucking can failed to ejaculate anything, let
alone foam, so a secondary plan was implemented. Rags. We (the boy-chic and
I) ventured outside and erected a ladder to make hole access simple. As we
began the climb, the tree rat appeared on the ground from round the corner
of the building and looked at us, but stood his ground. We continued with
the rag/hole interface solution and the tree rat fucked off, only to appear
on the roof some 20 feet away. It sidled casually closer until it was within
slapping distance (well almost) and sat down. It watched every move we made
but (now) sat his ground until we'd finished.

The descent was made and observations took place, whereupon we witnessed the
tree rat attempt another invasion through the now fully closed entrance. He
failed miserably, so had no alternative but to invade our next door
neighbours roof. Quite successfully too I might add, because within 5
minutes it had made a breakthrough and disappeared. Our neighbour said the
following day "Watch out for squirrels, we got one inside the office last
night and uit chewed through the alarm wiring look".

We were silent, but nodded our acknowledgement.

--
Beav

VN 750
Zed 1000
OMF# 19

 

Not to mention the firemen.


--
Beav

VN 750
Zed 1000
OMF# 19

 

They are handy for that mosquito eating thing. We have a couple that live
by our door. Haven't seen them yet this year though. The door lizard is a
very handy thing indeed they keep the damned big insects from the garden
under control.

They are much better indeed than the retarded tortoises that seem to
think pulling in the head and legs is a great defence tactic when faced
with oncoming traffic.

 

Two short axles, 4 wheels, a tube of Superglue and a length of string.

Give the buggers the time of their lives.

--
Beav

VN 750
Zed 1000
OMF# 19

 

In HK it was common to have steel bars on the inside of windows to
keep scrotes out and the high-rise building we first lived in had them
too; I always assumed as a safety thing.

 

I'd love another air rifle. Tempted, but this month I'm already
looking at releasing some savings just to keep the current account in
credit.

 

Fun but I might *just* get accused of using a sledge-hammer to crack a
Nutkins.

I did once see a 'combat shotgun' (not fired) but it was a pump-action
jobbie.

 

I was thinking of trying that, maybe with a bit of extra chicken wire
to prevent it just getting gnawed through.

Heh.

 

Naaaah, wot you need is a can of expanding foam, a length of hose that will
fit over the cans nozzle, and a hazel nut bored through to allow the other
end of the hose sit inside it snugly,

lay the hazel nut near where you last saw it in the roof, run the pipe back
to the can and connect, listen for the rusteling and chewing noise that
indicates it's found the nut and is eating it, then press the trigger on the
can of foam.

If the foam expands fast enough, it'll wedge him in the hole he enters
through as he runs off and tries to get back outside, then you dont need to
**** about finding the hole and blocking it up.

 

Using the patented Mavis Beacon "Hunt&Peck" Technique, gazz

I'd dismiss that as fantasy, but - based on the evidence - you're just
about stupid enough to try it.

 

Oh I dont know, I've fancied pigeon shooting with one since they came out.

Sooo 1990s, get with the 21st century, 300 cartridges a minute is
where it's at.

 

in the caribbean we even had steel cages mounted around the air conditioning
units, as that used to be a favourite point of entry for burglars and rapists.