Transport 2000 (Nicked from another NG)

Pip wrote

That is me that is.

I'd love too but opportunities seem few and far between these days. I
blame HRT.

 

Try following one when they put their foot down or standing behind one if
you have allergies.

Spawn of the Devil.

 

I wasn't really being a spelling pedant. Just a patronising ****,
really.

 

Top Gear or Third Gear

Well that's an interesting approach however it ignores two critical
factors.

Speeding has *never* caused an accident however bad driving has probably
caused 99.99% of all accidents. Slow bad drivers right down to 30 or 40
mph all of the time and you will still have most accidents because
that's what speed said bad drivers have most of their accidents at. It's
also the speed most pedestrian injury accidents happen. Train drivers to
operate their machinery competently, remove from the roads those who are
incapable of driving competently and most people will then make rather
rapid progress without any mishaps and enjoy themselves at the same
time.

We live in a finite universe on a planet with a finite lifespan orbiting
a sun with a finite lifespan. It simply doesn't matter whether we
consume all of our resources and cease to exist in any great numbers as
a species in 1000 generations or 1,000,000 generations. Einstein proved
without a shadow of doubt that not one member of the human race will
outlive our sun entering it's Nova state. It is therefor common sense
for these current generations to use the available resources as
profligately as necessary to maximise the enjoyment of our short lives

OR

are you making some unstated quasi religious statement?

I for one cannot see any other argument in support of your stance.

Yours Sincerely
Stewart MacDuff
MD
Bytel Networks Ltd

I thank ewe

'Hog

 

Oi!

 

snip

Read that as whinnies and immediately thought of whinging couriers mount.

If more people had bikes that whinnied[1] very loudly at cars the world
would be a better place.

[1] It may have been a donkey hee-haw but there were another eight
buttons on the device and I forget what they did.

 

To: k***i.p********


You are wrong to call for Top gear to be banned.

It's entertaining and it's intended as such. Jeremy
Clarkson presents a lot of views with which I agree,
on caravans, middle lane hogs and outdated, irrelevant
road safety standards - including speed limits. He
also presents a lot of views with which I don't agree,
on Porsches, men with beards and motorcycles.

If Top Gear doesn't say what you want said, then why
don't you produce your own program to promote your
message. Don't interfere with the right of anybody to
say what they want - including Jeremy Clarkson.

 

To: steve.h******­rg.uk

I completely agree with your diary entry regarding motorcycles.

They are nasty, dirty, dangerous things and ought to be banned.

I often see three, four or sometimes five motorcycles parked in a space
where one car would fit comfortably - How can they be so selfish?

Equally often I see them zipping though lines of stationary traffic
when the rest of us have to queue for many minutes at a time. It's just
not fair and somebody whould do something about it.

I'd have all those long-haired layabouts flogged, murdered and fed to
pigs.

 

To: steve.h******­rg.uk

I completely agree with your diary entry regarding motorcycles.

They are nasty, dirty, dangerous things and ought to be banned.

I often see three, four or sometimes five motorcycles parked in a space
where one car would fit comfortably - How can they be so selfish?

Equally often I see them zipping though lines of stationary traffic
when the rest of us have to queue for many minutes at a time. It's just
not fair and somebody should do something about it.

I'd have all those long-haired layabouts flogged, murdered and fed to
pigs.

 

"Christ Loincloth"

 

Define 'pollution'. Diesels emit more of some nasty things and less of
others.

 

In ways they do. ISTR that there's much more particulate matter comes
out of a diesel exhaust vs petrol, but petrol exhaust has various
chemicals in it. So the former will irritate like breathing in pollen,
dust, and oily soot, the other like breathing in TCP. Probably.

Judging by the exhaust of the 955 at BOSM I'm not sure which of my
vehicles is winning - I think the bike may be a tad over-fuelled at the
moment. In summary, **** T2000 and the horse they would've ridden in
on but it was too dangerous as it was so high up.

 

After seeing playt's outfit at the weekend you'd have objections too.
Apart from the noise when the silencer fell off. And the smell of
anyone who had a go. And the way it scattered Auvache.

Apart from that, they're dead wrong about the ludicrously high speed
bit.

 

"Angel"

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Not A Real E-Mail Address amazed us all with this
pearl of wisdom:

Try standing behind one of those fucking Routemaster buses. The quicker
they're consigned to the scrap heap the better.

Satan's sperm itself.

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Christofire amazed us all with this pearl of
wisdom:

**** their mothers, too.

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Christofire amazed us all with this pearl of
wisdom:

I rather liked it. I only know what it sounded like at car park speeds
but it sounded like bubbles to me. I think I spent more time looking at
Platy's bike than any other (maybe apart from sweller's) anyway.

 

Absolutely.. fucking feral apostrophes...

 

In uk.rec.motorcycles, Christofire amazed us all with this pearl of
wisdom:

"Whippings"

 

Do you have any idea how much of a fuckwit that makes you sound?

--
AndrewR, D.Bot (Celeritas)
Kawasaki ZX-6R J1, Fiat Coupe 20v Turbo
BOTAFOT#2,ITJWTFO#6,UKRMRM#1/13a,MCT#1,DFV#2,SKoGA#0 (and KotL)
BotToS#5,SBS#25,IbW#34, DS#5, COSOC# Suspended, KotTFSTR#
The speccy Geordie twat.